A Practical Workbook
Boundaries After Betrayal: A Practical Workbook
© 2026 Trust After Trauma / Betrayal Recovery Compass. All rights reserved.
No part of this workbook may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form without prior written permission from the publisher.
This workbook is intended for educational and personal growth purposes only. It is not a substitute for professional therapy, counseling, or medical advice. If you are in crisis, please contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 or the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline.
First Edition, 2026
If you are holding this workbook, someone has crossed a line that should never have been crossed. And now, in the middle of pain that most people cannot fathom, you are being told to "set boundaries." The advice is everywhere. In therapy sessions, in self-help books, in recovery groups, in well-meaning text messages from friends. Set boundaries. You need boundaries. Have you tried setting a boundary?
But here is what almost no one tells you: knowing you need boundaries and knowing how to actually set them are two completely different skills. One is awareness. The other is a practice. And practice requires tools, structure, and the kind of specific guidance that vague advice simply cannot provide.
That is why this workbook exists.
This is not a book about the theory of boundaries. You will not find lengthy explanations of attachment styles or deep dives into the psychology of betrayal. Those resources exist, and they have their place. This workbook is different. This is a hands-on, fill-in-the-worksheets, use-these-exact-words kind of resource. It was designed for the person who knows they need boundaries but has no idea where to start, or the person who has tried to set boundaries only to watch them dissolve within days.
Boundaries after betrayal are not about punishing the person who hurt you. They are not walls you build to keep everyone out. They are not ultimatums designed to force someone to change. Boundaries are decisions about how you will protect your own wellbeing. They are acts of self-respect in a season when your self-respect has been shattered.
Before we go further, let us be clear about what this workbook will not help you do:
You do not need to complete this entire workbook in one sitting. In fact, please do not try. Some chapters will feel urgent and immediately relevant. Others may not apply to your situation yet. Work through this at your own pace, in whatever order serves you. There is no right timeline for boundary work. There is only your timeline.
This workbook is designed to be written in. Print it out, grab a pen, and give yourself permission to be messy, honest, and imperfect on these pages. Crossed-out answers, tear-stained pages, and second thoughts are all welcome here.
Each chapter follows a consistent pattern:
Take a moment to answer these questions. They will serve as your baseline, something you can return to later to see how far you have come.
Answer honestly. There are no right answers.
Before you can build new boundaries, you need to understand where your current ones stand. Most people discover that betrayal did not create their boundary issues. It exposed them. The patterns were likely there before, quietly running in the background of your life. Betrayal simply turned the volume up to a level you could no longer ignore.
This chapter will help you take an honest inventory of where you are right now. Not where you think you should be. Not where you were before the betrayal. Where you actually are today. This is the foundation everything else is built on, so take your time with it.
The following worksheet asks you to rate your boundaries across ten areas of your life. For each area, rate yourself on a scale of 1 to 5:
Circle or write the number that best describes your current boundary strength in each area.
Over-functioning is one of the most common boundary violations betrayed partners commit against themselves. It looks like doing more, managing more, carrying more, and controlling more in an attempt to prevent further pain. It is exhausting, unsustainable, and it often masks the grief, fear, and anger underneath.
Check every statement that resonates with you right now:
Check all that apply to your current behavior.
0 to 3 checked: You have relatively healthy functioning patterns. Focus on maintaining them under stress.
4 to 7 checked: You are showing signs of over-functioning that need attention. Chapters 3 and 5 will be especially important for you.
8 to 11 checked: You are significantly over-functioning. This is common after betrayal, and it is not your fault, but it is something that needs to change for your healing. Consider working through this workbook with a therapist.
12 or more checked: You are in survival mode and carrying far more than one person should carry. Please prioritize getting professional support alongside this workbook. You deserve someone in your corner.
People-pleasing and poor boundaries are deeply intertwined. Many betrayed partners were expert people-pleasers long before the betrayal, which can make boundary-setting feel especially foreign and frightening. This checklist helps you identify the patterns that may be undermining your boundary work.
Check the patterns you recognize in yourself. Be gentle and honest.
Now that you have a clearer picture of where your boundaries stand, it is time to learn the structure that makes a boundary effective. A boundary without structure is just a wish. And wishes, as you have likely learned, do not protect you.
Every effective boundary has three components. All three must be present for the boundary to hold:
Statement (what you need or will not accept) + Consequence (what you will do if the boundary is crossed) + Follow-Through (actually doing what you said you would do)
Your boundary statement should be specific, behavioral, and clear. Avoid vague language like "I need you to be better" or "I need you to try harder." Instead, name the exact behavior you need to see (or stop seeing).
Vague: "I need you to be more honest."
Specific: "I need full transparency about where you are when you are not home, including honest answers about who you are with."
Vague: "I need more respect."
Specific: "I need you to stop raising your voice during our conversations. When voices are raised, the conversation ends."
The consequence is what you will do, not what you want them to do. This is where many people get stuck. A consequence is not a punishment you deliver. It is an action you take to protect yourself.
Not a consequence: "If you lie again, you will be sorry."
A consequence: "If I discover another lie, I will move to the guest room and pause all conversations about our relationship until our next therapy session."
This is where boundaries live or die. Without follow-through, you have taught the other person that your words do not match your actions. This is not said to shame you. Follow-through is genuinely hard, especially when the other person's response makes you feel guilty, afraid, or doubtful. But every time you follow through on a boundary, you build trust with yourself. And self-trust is the foundation of your entire recovery.
Think of a boundary you need to set. Break it into the three parts.
Use these templates to draft boundaries for your specific situation. Write in pencil if you want to revise later. These are starting points, not final drafts.
"For me to continue working on this relationship, I need . Specifically, that means ."
"If I discover that , I will ."
"I am willing to discuss , but I need it to happen (when/where/how). I am not willing to ."
"If the conversation becomes , I will ."
"Right now, I need when it comes to our physical space. This is not a punishment. It is what I need to feel ."
"If this boundary is not respected, I will ."
"I cannot begin to rebuild trust while there is any contact between you and . That includes ."
"If I learn that contact has resumed, I will understand that as , and I will ."
"I need what happened between us to stay between . I am not ready for to know."
"If details are shared without my consent, I will ."
"I need to be able to express my feelings about this without being told that I am . I need you to listen without ."
"If my feelings are dismissed or I am told to 'get over it,' I will ."
"I need full transparency about our finances, including . I need access to ."
"If I discover financial deception, I will ."
"For me to stay in this relationship, I need you to actively participate in your recovery. That means ."
"If you stop attending or cease engaging in your recovery work, I will ."
"I need to know your schedule in advance, including . If plans change, I need you to ."
"If you are unaccounted for without communication, I will ."
"I commit to . I will not allow myself to because I know it keeps me stuck in ."
"When I feel the urge to break this boundary with myself, I will instead."
One of the most common sources of confusion in betrayal recovery is the difference between these three things. They sound similar. They can even use similar language. But they serve very different purposes, and confusing them can undermine your entire boundary practice.
A request asks the other person to do something. The other person has the freedom to say yes or no. You may be disappointed if they decline, but there is no stated consequence. Example: "I would really appreciate it if you would text me when you are going to be late."
A boundary states what you need and what you will do to protect yourself if that need is not met. The focus is on your behavior, not theirs. Example: "I need to know when you will be home. If you are more than 30 minutes late without a text, I will proceed with my evening plans without you and we can discuss it later."
An ultimatum threatens a specific punishment if the other person does not comply. The focus is on controlling their behavior. Example: "If you are late one more time, I am filing for divorce." Ultimatums come from fear and a desire to control. They rarely lead to lasting change.
For each statement, write R (request), B (boundary), or U (ultimatum).
This is the chapter most people turn to first, and understandably so. The person who betrayed you is likely the person you need the most boundaries with, and also the person it feels most terrifying to set them with. That paradox is one of the cruelest aspects of betrayal recovery.
What follows are specific boundaries for the most common situations that arise after betrayal, complete with scripts you can use word-for-word and worksheets to personalize them. You do not need to set all of these at once. Start with the ones that feel most urgent and add others as your capacity grows.
After betrayal built on deception, transparency is not optional. It is the foundation that any future trust must be built on. Transparency boundaries define what "being honest" actually looks like in practice, because vague commitments to honesty are worth very little when trust has been destroyed.
"I want to talk about what transparency needs to look like going forward. This is not about punishing you or controlling you. It is about what I need to feel safe enough to remain in this relationship. Right now, I need full access to your phone, email, and social media accounts. I need you to share your location with me. And I need honest, complete answers when I ask questions about where you have been or who you have been with. I understand this may feel invasive to you. But the alternative, me living in a state of constant anxiety and suspicion, is not sustainable for either of us."
"I understand that this feels uncomfortable. And I hear that it might feel controlling from your perspective. But I want to be honest about where we are: I am not asking for transparency because I want to control you. I am asking because the deception that happened made it impossible for me to trust my own perception of reality. Transparency is how we rebuild that. It will not be forever. But it is what I need right now."
Write out the specific transparency behaviors you need.
After betrayal, conversations can go from calm to catastrophic in seconds. You may find yourself in hours-long arguments at midnight, circular conversations that resolve nothing, or discussions where your pain is minimized, redirected, or weaponized. Communication boundaries protect the quality of your conversations and preserve your emotional safety.
"I want to be able to talk about what happened and how I am feeling. But I have noticed that when we try to have these conversations after 9 PM, or when either of us has been drinking, or when we are both exhausted, they escalate and cause more harm. Going forward, I need us to have difficult conversations during the daytime, when we are both regulated, and ideally with a time limit of 45 minutes. If we need more time, we can schedule another conversation. If things escalate, either of us can call a time out and we will revisit it within 24 hours."
"When you say things like 'it was not that bad' or 'you are overreacting,' it makes me feel like my experience does not matter. I need you to listen to my pain without correcting it, minimizing it, or comparing it to your own. If you are unable to do that in a given moment, I need you to tell me honestly so I can take my feelings to someone who can hold them."
Your relationship with physical intimacy will change after betrayal. There is no "normal" response. Some people want no physical contact at all. Others find themselves seeking it desperately as a way to feel close or to confirm the relationship still exists. Still others experience intrusive images during intimacy that make it feel traumatic rather than connecting. All of these responses are valid, and all of them deserve boundaries.
"I need to take physical intimacy off the table for now. I want you to know that this is not a punishment and it is not permanent. It is because right now, when we are physically close, I either feel disconnected from my own body or I am flooded with images and thoughts that make the experience painful rather than connecting. I need time to work through this, and I will let you know when I am ready to revisit this conversation. In the meantime, I need you to respect this boundary without pressuring me, guilting me, or making me feel like I am failing us."
"I am open to physical intimacy, but I need some things to be different. I need us to check in with each other before and after. I need you to understand that I might need to stop in the middle, and that is not a rejection of you. I need the freedom to say what I need in the moment without having to explain or justify it. And I need you to know that if I am triggered during intimacy, the most helpful thing you can do is hold space, not take it personally."
If the betrayal involved another person, the question of whether your partner maintains any contact with that individual is not a negotiation. It is a bottom-line boundary. Any relationship recovery expert will tell you: there is no rebuilding trust while contact with the third party continues.
"I cannot begin to rebuild trust while there is any contact between you and [name]. I need that contact to end completely. That means no texts, no calls, no emails, no social media interaction, no 'accidental' run-ins that could have been avoided, and no communication through third parties. If contact resumes for any reason, including if [name] reaches out to you, I need you to tell me immediately and show me the communication. If I discover that contact has been hidden from me, I will understand that as a choice, and I will act accordingly to protect myself."
"I understand that you cannot completely avoid [name] because of [work/shared friends/etc.]. But I need us to establish clear guidelines about what is acceptable. I need all interactions to be strictly professional and limited to what is absolutely necessary. I need you to tell me about any interaction that goes beyond that, on the same day it happens. And if there is an option to reduce contact further, such as requesting a transfer, changing your schedule, or limiting shared social events, I need you to pursue that option."
In the digital age, betrayal and technology are deeply intertwined. Social media, messaging apps, secret accounts, and encrypted communication can all become tools of deception. Device boundaries are not about surveillance forever. They are about establishing a period of earned transparency that allows trust to slowly rebuild.
"Going forward, I need us to operate with open devices. That means no passcodes I do not know, no apps that disappear messages, no secondary email accounts, and no social media profiles I am not aware of. I am not going to be checking your phone every day. But I need to know that I could, at any time, and that I would find nothing hidden. If I discover a new account, a deleted conversation, or a hidden app, I will treat that the same way I would treat the original deception."
Betrayal does not happen in a vacuum. It sends shockwaves through every relationship in your life. Family members will have opinions. Friends will give advice. Coworkers may notice something is wrong. And if you have children, they will sense the shift even if they do not understand it. Each of these relationships requires its own set of boundaries.
Family members, whether yours or your partner's, often insert themselves into the situation in unhelpful ways. Your mother may push you to leave. Your partner's sister may defend them. Your father may minimize what happened. These responses, however well-intentioned, can be deeply harmful if boundaries are not established.
"I love you and I know you are saying this because you are hurting for me. But I need you to trust that I am working through this in the way that is right for me, at my own pace, with professional support. When you tell me what to do, even though I know it comes from love, it adds pressure to an already overwhelming situation. What I need from you right now is to listen without telling me what to do, and to trust that I am capable of making my own decisions."
"I understand that [name] is your [son/daughter/sibling] and you love them. I am not asking you to stop loving them. But I need you to understand that what happened caused real harm, and when you minimize it or make excuses, it feels like my pain does not matter. I need our interactions to be free of commentary about my relationship decisions. If that is not possible right now, I may need to limit our contact until I am in a more stable place."
Friends mean well. But "just leave" and "once a cheater, always a cheater" and "I would never put up with that" are not helpful responses to a person in the middle of betrayal trauma. These statements oversimplify an extraordinarily complex situation and can leave you feeling judged, misunderstood, or pressured.
"I appreciate that you care about me, and I know watching me go through this is hard for you too. But what I need from you right now is not advice. I have a therapist for that. What I need is a friend who will listen, check in on me, and not judge me for whatever I decide to do. If there are moments when it is too hard for you to do that, I understand, but please tell me rather than giving me advice I have not asked for."
Betrayal trauma does not politely pause during business hours. You may find yourself unable to concentrate, breaking down in the restroom, checking your phone obsessively, or simply unable to perform at your usual level. Work boundaries protect your professional life during a time when everything feels like it is falling apart.
"I am going through a significant personal situation that may affect my focus and availability over the next few weeks. I am getting professional support and I am committed to meeting my responsibilities here. I may need some flexibility with my schedule for therapy appointments, and I wanted to be upfront about that. I am not ready to share the details, and I would appreciate your understanding and discretion."
If you have children, navigating what they know and how they experience this crisis is one of the most emotionally complex parts of recovery. Children are remarkably perceptive. They know something is wrong. The question is not whether to address it, but how to address it in a way that protects them while not burying them in adult problems.
Children need to know three things: (1) Mom and Dad are having a hard time, but we are getting help. (2) This is not your fault. (3) You are safe and loved, no matter what happens between us.
"You might have noticed that Mommy and Daddy have been sad or upset lately. We are having a grown-up problem, and we are working on it with a special helper. It is absolutely not your fault. You are so loved, and no matter what, that will never change. If you ever feel worried or scared, you can always come tell us, okay?"
"I want to be honest with you about something. Your [mom/dad] and I are going through a really difficult time. We are getting professional help and we are working on it. I do not want you to feel like you need to take sides or fix this. This is an adult problem, and it is our responsibility to work through it. What I need you to know is that both of your parents love you, this is not your fault, and you are welcome to talk to us or to a counselor about how you are feeling."
Some of the most important boundaries in your recovery are not with your partner, your family, or your friends. They are with yourself. After betrayal, your nervous system shifts into survival mode, and that survival mode can drive behaviors that feel necessary in the moment but keep you trapped in a cycle of pain. These self-boundaries are not about being "stronger" or "having more willpower." They are acts of deep compassion for a nervous system that is trying its best to protect you, even when its methods are no longer serving you.
Checking the other person's social media. Scrolling through their followers. Looking at every photo, every comment, every like. Searching for clues about what they are doing, who they are with, whether they seem happy or remorseful. If you have done this, you are not crazy. Your brain is seeking information to resolve the uncertainty that trauma creates. But you know from experience: it never makes you feel better. It always makes you feel worse.
"I commit to not searching for, viewing, or checking [name]'s social media profiles. When I feel the urge, I will recognize it as my nervous system seeking reassurance, and I will call [support person's name], write in my journal, or go for a walk instead. If I break this boundary, I will not shame myself. I will notice it, name it, and recommit."
The urge to investigate, to check the phone bill, to look through browser history, to verify the story they just told you, can be overwhelming. In the early days, some investigation may be appropriate and even necessary. But over time, if you find yourself spending hours each day in detective mode, that behavior is no longer serving your healing. It is fueling your hypervigilance and keeping your nervous system in a constant state of threat detection.
"I will limit my investigation and checking activities to one 20-minute window per day, at [specific time]. Outside of that window, I will write down any questions or concerns in my journal and bring them to my next therapy session or my daily checking window. If I find myself checking outside the window, I will put my phone down, take three deep breaths, and text [support person]."
Emotional flooding is when the pain becomes so intense that you lose access to your rational brain. You may find yourself screaming, sobbing uncontrollably, threatening things you do not mean, or completely shutting down. Flooding is a trauma response, and while you cannot always prevent it, you can create a plan for how you will care for yourself when it happens.
"When I notice that I am becoming flooded, as signaled by [your specific signs: racing heart, inability to think clearly, trembling, the urge to scream], I will say 'I need a pause' and remove myself from the conversation or situation. I will go to [specific location: my bedroom, the car, the porch] and use the following grounding technique: [name it: cold water on wrists, 5-4-3-2-1 senses exercise, box breathing]. I will not re-engage in the conversation until I have been regulated for at least 20 minutes. I will not make any major decisions while flooded."
After betrayal, the temptation to make big decisions quickly is enormous. You may want to file for divorce today. Change the locks tonight. Tell everyone you know right now. Empty the bank account this afternoon. These impulses are understandable, and some of them may turn out to be the right decisions eventually. But making them in the heat of emotional flooding almost always leads to regret, because decisions made from a flooded nervous system are survival responses, not thoughtful choices.
No major decision gets made within 72 hours of a trigger, a new discovery, a big argument, or an emotional flood. You write the decision down. You sit with it. You discuss it with your therapist or a trusted support person. And if, after 72 hours of regulation, the decision still feels right, you move forward with it. This rule is not about being indecisive. It is about being intentional.
Setting a boundary is the beginning. The real work starts when that boundary gets tested, and it will. Sometimes by the other person, who may push back, argue, guilt-trip, or simply ignore it. And sometimes by you, when the discomfort of holding the boundary feels worse than the pain of dropping it.
This chapter prepares you for both.
Pushback does not mean your boundary was wrong. In many cases, the intensity of the pushback is proportional to how much the other person benefited from the absence of that boundary. Here are the most common forms of pushback and how to respond:
"I can see that you are upset about this boundary. I am not going to argue about whether it is reasonable. This is what I need to feel safe. You are welcome to share your feelings about it with your therapist, and I will share mine with mine. But the boundary itself is not negotiable."
"I hear that this boundary feels hard for you. It is hard for me too. But I have learned that when I abandon my own needs to avoid making you uncomfortable, I end up resenting you and losing myself in the process. This boundary is not about you. It is about me staying whole enough to even be in this relationship."
"You are right. I do not trust you right now. And that is not something I chose. It is the result of what happened. Trust is rebuilt through consistent, transparent behavior over time, not through me pretending I feel something I do not. This boundary is part of the rebuilding process. It is not a punishment for what you did. It is a requirement for where we go from here."
There will be moments when you want to abandon your own boundaries. When you miss the closeness. When you are exhausted from maintaining them. When it would be so much easier to just pretend everything is fine. These moments do not mean you are weak. They mean you are human. But they are also the moments that matter most.
Use this worksheet any time you are tempted to retract a boundary.
Boundaries will get violated. By your partner. By you. By family members, friends, and circumstances beyond your control. When a boundary is violated, the question is not "how do I punish this?" but "how do I repair this?"
Repair involves four steps:
"I need to address something. We agreed that [state the boundary]. That boundary was crossed when [state what happened]. I want you to know how this affected me: [state the impact: it set back my trust, it triggered me, it made me question whether this can work]. Going forward, the boundary remains the same. And the consequence we discussed, [state the consequence], is now in effect. I am not saying this to punish you. I am saying this because my boundaries only mean something if I enforce them."
"I broke my own boundary today. I [state what you did]. I am not going to beat myself up about it, but I am going to name it honestly. I understand why I did it: [state the trigger or feeling that led to it]. And I am recommitting to this boundary now, because I know that it exists for a reason. My healing matters, and I am going to keep showing up for it, even imperfectly."
Sometimes a boundary needs to be restated entirely, especially if it has been violated repeatedly or if time has passed and the boundary has softened without your conscious decision.
"I want to revisit some of the boundaries we discussed earlier, because I have noticed that they have gotten blurry over time. That is partly my responsibility, because I have not been as consistent in enforcing them as I need to be. But I am recommitting now. Here is where I am: [restate the boundaries]. I know this might feel like going backward. But it is actually going forward, because I am being more honest with both of us about what I need."
"I need to update one of my boundaries. When we first discussed [original boundary], I thought that would be enough. But based on what has happened since then, I realize I need something different. Going forward, [state the new boundary]. I understand that this is more than we originally agreed to. But my needs have become clearer as I have done more work, and I owe it to both of us to be honest about that."
Use this any time a boundary has been violated or has eroded.
As your recovery progresses, your boundary needs will evolve. The boundaries you set in the first weeks after discovery will not be the same boundaries you need six months, a year, or two years later. This chapter addresses the more nuanced boundary situations that arise as you move further into your recovery journey.
If you and your partner are separated, whether by your choice, their choice, or mutual agreement, you need an entirely different set of boundaries. Separation without clear boundaries often becomes more painful than the betrayal itself, because the ambiguity breeds anxiety, false hope, and ongoing hurt.
"Since we are spending time apart, I need us to agree on some ground rules. I need to know that during this separation, [state your needs: no dating other people, continued individual therapy, limited communication to specific topics, etc.]. I also need clarity on logistics: [how finances will work, how we communicate about children, whether we attend events together, etc.]. I am not trying to control the separation. I am trying to make it something that serves our healing rather than something that creates more chaos."
Complete if you are currently separated or considering separation.
Reconciliation is not the absence of boundaries. In many ways, it requires more boundaries, not fewer. If you are choosing to rebuild the relationship, you need clear expectations about what reconciliation looks like in practice, because "trying again" without structure is just repeating the old pattern with hope attached to it.
"I want to be clear about what reconciliation means to me. It does not mean going back to how things were. It means building something new, together, with full transparency and mutual accountability. For me to continue in this process, I need [state specific requirements: consistent therapy attendance, demonstrated honesty, willingness to discuss the betrayal when I need to, patience with my triggers and timeline]. If these things are not happening, I reserve the right to pause reconciliation and reassess. This is not a threat. It is my commitment to not abandoning myself in the process of trying to save this relationship."
Complete if you are actively in reconciliation.
When your partner is actively engaged in their own recovery work, attending therapy, going to groups, being transparent, and showing genuine remorse, the boundary landscape shifts. You are no longer setting boundaries in a vacuum. You are setting them within a collaborative healing process. This is actually harder in some ways, because the progress they are making can create pressure to lower your boundaries before you are truly ready.
"I want you to know that I see the work you are doing, and it matters to me. I notice the therapy sessions, the honesty, the effort. And I need you to understand that my boundaries are not a reflection of whether I think you are changing. They are a reflection of where I am in my healing. My timeline is different from yours. I may need these boundaries to stay in place longer than either of us would like, and that does not mean I am not recognizing your growth. It means my trust is rebuilding at its own pace, and pushing it faster would not be real trust at all."
This is one of the most painful situations in betrayal recovery: when your partner is not doing the work. They may deny the severity of what happened, refuse therapy, blame you, or continue the harmful behavior. In this situation, boundaries become less about the relationship and more about your survival and sanity.
"I have been very clear about what I need in order to stay in this relationship. Those needs have not changed, and they are not going away. I see that you are not currently willing or able to meet them. I am not going to beg you to do the work. That is your choice. But I need you to understand the choice I am making in response: I am going to focus entirely on my own healing. I am going to build a support system that does not depend on you. And I am going to make decisions about my future based on the reality of what is happening, not the hope of what might happen. I still care about you. But I will not abandon myself while waiting for you to decide I am worth fighting for."
Recovery is not linear, but tracking your progress helps you see how far you have come when the hard days make it feel like you have not moved at all. Use these worksheets weekly or biweekly to check in with yourself about your boundary practice.
Rate your boundary confidence each week on a scale of 1 to 10. Over time, you will begin to see the upward trend, even with the inevitable dips.
After working through this book, return to the Boundary Audit from Chapter 1 and rate yourself again. Compare your scores.
Rate each area again (1 to 5). Compare to your original scores.
Write a commitment to yourself. This is your anchor for the hard days ahead.
I, _______________, commit to honoring my boundaries because...
Signed: ___________________________ Date: _______________
Setting boundaries after betrayal is some of the bravest work a person can do. And it is not work you were meant to do in isolation. When you are ready for the next step, there are two places we would love to welcome you.
A private, supportive community of women who understand exactly what you are going through. No judgment. No unsolicited advice. Just people who get it, walking alongside you.
Visit Trust After TraumaA 12-week guided recovery intensive with clinical support, community accountability, and a proven framework for moving from survival to healing. This is the deep work, and you are ready for it.
Learn About the IntensiveThank you for trusting us with your healing. The fact that you are here, doing this work, says everything about who you are becoming.
Betrayal Recovery Compass
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